I Must Betray You

I Must Betray You Quotes and Analysis

“Wisdom—thank god that’s something this country can’t take from you. But trust no one. Do you hear me? No one. Right now there is no such thing as a ‘confidant.’ ”

Bunu, Chapter 14

In this quotation, Bunu warns Cristian that members of his family are informers. Bunu values independent thought and wisdom and expresses his gratitude that Cristian has absorbed these lessons and regards the regime with a critical eye. However, Bunu also recognizes that Cristian's indignation toward the regime and sense of hope for the future encourages him to seek out meaningful, authentic relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners. Bunu warns Cristian that, ironically, his wisdom endangers him, highlighting that the citizen spy network destroys relationships that make life meaningful by using these relationships as opportunities for exploitation and manipulation. This quotation also foreshadows the revelation that Cici and Moira worked as informers.

"Just remember, Pui, good luck comes at a price. Bad luck is free.”

Cici, Chapter 16

Cici speaks this vague phrase to Cristian after Cristian evasively explains that his Coca-Cola and American dollar are consequences of "good luck and bad luck." When read in retrospect, this quotation reveals Cici's painful experiences working for the Secu. After being blackmailed, sexually exploited, and betraying her family's secrets, Cici secures passports for herself and Cristian that will help them escape Romania. These passports are the "good luck" to which Cici indirectly refers, the price being the abuse she suffers as an informer.

Our hero, Draculescu, sat in his cardboard castle wearing a hollow crown, surrounding himself with clapping men who bowed to him as the Golden Man of the Carpathians while his people suffered, starved, and lived in terror.

Cristian in narration, Chapter 17

In this quotation, Cristian describes Nicolae Ceaușescu's hypocritical leadership and egregious abuse of power. Cristian sarcastically refers to Ceaușescu as "our hero," a moniker the regime expects its citizens to use to describe Ceaușescu, to contrast Ceaușescu's glorious image with his cruel, unspeakable actions. Cristian refers to Ceaușescu using the portmanteau "Draculescu," combining Ceaușescu's name with the infamous Romanian vampire, Dracula. To highlight the superficiality of Ceaușescu's authority, Cristian describes the symbols of his power, a castle and a crown, using weak, superficial materials like cardboard. Explaining how the Aplaudacii celebrate Ceaușescu regardless of the consequences of his choices, Cristian scathingly condemns the leader for using his position to exploit the ordinary people while simultaneously claiming to uphold the egalitarian ideals of communism.

It wasn’t disgust. It was despair. That’s what I felt, seeing the colorful photos of our leader cuddling with kangaroos in Australia and posing with Mickey Mouse in some citrus dream called California.

Cristian in narration, Chapter 29

Cristian finds images of Ceaușescu's public appearances and diplomatic relationships with Western leaders while visiting the American library. These photographs clearly illustrate that Ceaușescu upheld two false images simultaneously: a progressive attitude toward the Western powers and a "glorious leader" persona for the Romanian people. Seeing Ceaușescu enjoying the privileges he denies his citizens, like travel, vacation, and pleasure, Cristian experiences a surprising emotional response. Since Cristian knows Ceaușescu is corrupt, he is not angry or surprised by the leader's moral hypocrisy. Rather, Cristian realizes that no foreign nations will help Romania, as other world leaders do not suspect that Ceaușescu's image of Romania is a facade.

This quotation integrates several motifs and symbols into a single sentiment. For example, American pop culture, like the reference to Mickey Mouse, is a motif used throughout the text to convey Cristian's romantic, escapist vision of America and the West compared to the hardships he experiences in Romania. Fruit symbolizes hope and prosperity; when Cristian describes California as "citrus," he highlights the state's freedom and prosperity. Lastly, Cristian references the photograph's color to emphasize the joy and hope people outside of Romania experience, as he describes Bucharest as "grey" and "monochrome."

“Your pain, it inspires me...Yes, inspires me. This regime steals so much from us. Some, like your father, are forced to go silent, dormant. But to feel so deeply, that is the very essence of being human. You give me hope.”

Bunu, Chapter 34

In this quotation, Bunu explains to Cristian the power of experiencing intense emotional pain, as numbness and silence create complicity. Bunu regards Cristian's anger and hurt as powerful, hopeful forces, as he anticipates Cristian will eventually direct his rage toward the regime to create change and progress. To explain why Cristian's pain is so powerful, Bunu contrasts Cristian with his father, who attempts to survive his pain and protect his family by maintaining silence. This quotation also subtly foreshadows Bunu's death: by acknowledging Cristian's power and humanity, Bunu transfers the responsibility to question authority to his grandson.

The volume grew, a freight train of sound. A feeling of solidarity rose, growing within the crowd. Romania had found its voice. And we were using it, together.

Cristian in narration, Chapter 63

As he joins the protest, Cristian is inspired by the crowd screaming condemnation at Ceaușescu. Throughout the text, silence is described as a form of complicity and a consequence of oppression. Romanians like Cristian's father refrain from speaking because the network of citizen spies and bugged homes makes expressing oneself dangerous. Because the regime controlled its people by creating a sense of isolation, it is symbolically powerful that Romania "found its voice" by standing together against tyranny, as the collective is more powerful than any individual.

“I am living history. I am freedom...That is my statement.”

A Prisoner, Chapter 66

Cristian is arrested in a group with other protestors. They are tortured as the soldiers attempt to force them to make confessions and statements. However, none of the protestors admit guilt or give evidence against others; having suffered acutely under the regime in isolation, their collective refusal to accept further mistreatment is powerful. The protestor's statement poetically expresses the theme of "Memory." The Securiate, under Ceaușescu's direction, attempted to rewrite history and deny people their freedom by controlling expression and memories. Though the protestor understands that his life will likely go unremembered as the regime sanitizes its image to the outside world, he affirms that his protest is valuable, contributing to history even if the contribution is forgotten.

Trading Kents for the lives of children. And he said it without hesitation, without the pain and shameful truth it carried—that the guards cared more about nicotine than humans.

Cristian in narration, Chapter 68

At Jilava, the adult prisoners collect cigarettes to bribe the guards into releasing the children. This quotation expresses the theme of "Dehumanization" on multiple levels. First, the idea that children are held as political prisoners is inherently disturbing. Second, the soldiers, like the protestors, have been exploited and manipulated. However, given a position of power, they no longer view the lives of their fellow human beings as important; the soldiers, willing to torture children, prioritize their comfort over the dignity of their fellow citizens and their devotion to the regime, accepting bribes to save the lives of children.

“No. We’re all trying to save our country...Every one of us. And if you haven’t noticed, the young people have been the bravest. No regrets in bravery.”

Alex, Chapter 77

Cristian discusses his guilt over Luca's injury with Alex Pavel. Cristian feels responsible for Luca's suffering and amputation, as Luca was shot while trying to save Cristian. Alex reassures Cristian that Luca will not blame Cristian for his injury, nor was Luca focused on saving Cristian's life. In this quotation, Alex explains that Cristian's life is part of a larger whole, and saving Cristian from death and violence was part of saving Romania from Ceaușescu. Alex also highlights that the "young people" exhibited more bravery than the older generations, who were unwilling to accept a hopeless future. Though Cristian is still pained for his friend, he accepts Alex's argument that Luca will not regret saving Cristian's life, as his actions led to Romania's liberation.

After decades of prolonged suffering, the hasty finality felt confusing somehow. Was that how it was supposed to end? So quickly? I suddenly had an odd, lingering sensation, unsure of what I was feeling. Did we have the full truth? What exactly had happened—and how?

Cristian in narration, Chapter 80

After Ceaușescu's execution, Cristian feels confused and underwhelmed. Death feels too merciful an end for a person who inflicted mental and physical torture on millions of people for decades; Cristian feels that justice can only be served through the act of remembering and revealing the truth. One of the most lasting impacts of Ceaușescu's regime was the deficit of truth and memory he inflicted on the people through the imposition of silence and propaganda. In the epilogue, Cristian addresses this deficit to find healing by accessing the Secu documents, writing his experiences in a manuscript, and confronting Agent Paddle Hands.